I haven’t watched much TV this week due to all the gaming I’ve been doing, and I’ve been remiss in posting my daily menu for the two of you who read it. The menu tonight:

Justified: There’s only a few episodes left, and there’s a whole lot of story threads out there. I find myself hoping they don’t wrap everything up by the end of the season. With Boyd re-entering the criminal underworld, Mags as the marijuana kingpin, and Dickie as the loose cannon, I’d be thrilled if this all spilled into season three, because having multiple crime bosses struggling for control is more interesting than just one bad guy on the top of the heap. I suspect most of it will be resolved, though. Mags will probably take a fall and Dickie seems too stupid to survive much longer. I’m sure Boyd will make it to season three, though.

As far as the hitmen from last week, I suspect they were sent by Winona’s ex (or the mob goons he’s associated with) to rub her out — Mags wouldn’t employ anyone who drove a Mercedes. So, that’s all gonna be in play, too, along with the stolen money storyline… man, it’s gearing up to be a busy conclusion this season. (FX)

Modern Family: Cameron and Mitchell hunt through their family to find a suitable guardian for Lily in the event of their deaths. Kids aren’t my thing, but the little girl who plays Lily is freakin’ adorable. Actually, Lily is probably played by twin girls. So, they’re both adorable. Looks like Philip Baker Hall and Nathan Lane both return as guests tonight. (ABC)

Extreme Couponing: People use coupons and I watch them. (TLC)

Breaking In: This premiered a couple weeks ago, and wasn’t terribly good, but entertaining enough to keep an eye on. It’s going for the Community vibe, with a bunch of wacky, over-the-top characters, led by Christian Slater, who isn’t really funny. And he’s starting to look kind of weird. Like, his eyes are shrinking and his head is growing. He reminds me of Robocop without the helmet:

Maybe it’s just me. (Fox)

Happy Endings: Another new show with a decent cast, some laughs, but uneven as hell and trying way too hard. Hopefully it’ll settle down a bit. I like Casey Wilson, who had a brief stint on SNL, and she’s probably the best part of this show. (ABC)

Workaholics: This is a terrible, sloppy, crude, bottom-feeding show that I shouldn’t like because I’m not twelve. But I like it. (Comedy Central)

The second segment featured the guy from the pilot, who bought a ton of stuff with the intent of donating some of it to U.S. soldiers, which is nice. Apparently, he’s donated tens of thousands of dollars worth of goods in the same manner. It’s great to see such support for our soldiers, I only wish they’d shown video of the soldiers opening their gift packages to see the looks on their faces as they received twenty pounds of women’s deodorant and Colgate toothpaste.

There was a twist at the end where it looked like he had used all his coupons and would still have to pay sixty bucks, but that twist was resolved .00034 second later and he didn’t have to pay sixty bucks. I won’t spoil it for you, but the solution to this problem involved more coupons.

I also got around to watching The Sports Show with Norm MacDonald from Tuesday and it was actually really fun. Sloppy as hell, shoddily constructed, it sounded like the audience was actually talking to each other during part of it, and Norm flubbed a bunch of lines (including his first joke) but a lot of good laughs overall. To the menu!

Community: Took me a while to get into this show, but I’m in deep now. It’s a bit overly gimmicky and I sort of hope they get rid of Chevy Chase, because he’s not really much fun. Tonight’s episode sounds like it centers around… let’s see… Chevy Chase. Darn. (NBC)

The Paul Riser Show: Paul Riser has used a time machine to escape the mid-90’s, where we had him safely locked away, and he has a new show. I’ve got nothing against him, really, he just seems to be a relic of a time when he was the best we could do, and we can do a lot better than him nowadays. The show looks like a Curb Your Enthusiasm style affair, which is underlined by visit from Larry David. (NBC)

The Office: I really don’t watch this anymore, but I might tune in to see how they handle Steve Carell’s departure. (NBC)

Parks and Recreation: Seasons 1 and 2 are on Netflix Instant, so if you haven’t been watching there’s an easy way to catch up (mostly). This is my favorite TV show right now. It’s not the funniest, but it doesn’t have to be: I just consistently enjoy pretty much everyone on it. (NBC)

30 Rock: Tina Fey and Alec Baldwin are always great together, everyone else, less so, but it’s still usually pretty watchable. Former seasons are also available on Netfix Instant, and I think the show works best when you’re consuming mass quantities at once. (NBC)

House Hunters International: People with a million dollar budget look for a home in Australia. Will they be able to afford the platinum mansion with sixteen bedrooms and a helicopter landing pad, or will they have to settle for the solid gold orbiting space mansion with only fourteen bedrooms? (HGTV)

As I’m typing this week’s menu, I’m sitting in a cafe across from two young people clearly on a first date. Man, I’m so glad I’m not single anymore. The mid-day coffee date is the worst date ever. Even if things totally work out, both people have horrible coffee breath and it’s the middle of the afternoon (on a Sunday, in this case). Luckily for these two, it is clearly not working out, though they’re both trying to pretend it is. I feel like I should pull a gun and rob the cafe, if only to give them an excuse to cut the date short.

This cafe also appears to be a prime spot for divorced couples to swap out their shared children. So, this whole place is incredibly depressing.

Anyway, here’s what’s coming to screens this week!

Movies

Arthur:  Russel Brand is so astoundingly ugly it’s sort of fascinating, but not enough to get me to a theater for this remake of the 1981 Dudley Moore/Liza Minelli romantic comedy. I hope they at least blast some Christopher Cross. (April 8)

Hanna: A little girl is raised in Finland to be a super-assassin by her ex-CIA dad. Then she kicks everyone’s ass, Bourne-style. Think I’ll wait for the rental. (April 8)

Your Highness: I guess this is Robin Hood for stoners or something? Count me among the seemingly few who don’t think Danny McBride is all that hilarious. Yes, he says inappropriate things in a loud voice, but so does this guy I work with and I wouldn’t pay ten bucks to watch him for ninety straight minutes. Expect lots of pot jokes and sack-taps. (April 8)

DVD/Blu-ray

Tron Legacy: I missed this in theaters because I never really was that into Tron but I will definitely rent it because I was sort of into Tron. (April 5)

I Love You Phillip Morris: This will be added to the bottom of my Netflix DVD queue and will remain there for ages as I constantly add new items in front of it. Then, some day, perhaps years from now, it will actually be mailed to me and it will sit on my counter for a few weeks until I send it back unwatched. Some films are just like that. (April 5)

Television

Lights Out: Season and series finale (it’s been cancelled). Like Terriers, this wasn’t a fantastic show but probably deserved a second season, based on quality if not viewership. The problem I was having with it was that the show was only fun if Leary was fighting, but he would only fight if he needed money, so to keep him fighting he’d always need to be broke, which resulted in the show having to constantly think up reasons for him to keep losing the money he’d make from fighting. Anyway, in the final episode he climbs into the ring with Death Row Reynolds, the fight we’ve been waiting for the entire season. With no season two, it doesn’t really matter if he wins or loses, but I’ll still check it out. (Tuesday, 10pm, FX)

Justified: The thing I’m finding most interesting about Justified this season is that Raylan isn’t an anti-hero: he’s not really fighting personal demons or being haunted by anything in his past. Pretty rare for good TV, and especially for FX, to just let their hero be a hero. In this week’s episode, the big dumb violent guy gets violent again. (Wednesday, 10pm, FX)

Community, Parks & Rec, 30-Rock: All reruns this week (boooo). Perfect Couples is new, though, because it got cancelled due to it sucking, and they need to run all the remaining episodes to make room for — choke — Paul Reiser’s new show. (Thursday, NBC)

The Killing: Sunday’s two-hour premiere of the season-long murder mystery was a little heavy-handed but otherwise excellent, and will be re-aired a number of times this week if you missed it (it’s also streaming commercial free on AMC’s site). AMC’s choices of what makes an American Movie Classic are dubious at best (The Chronicles of Riddick?) but they really know how to make good TV. (Sunday, 10pm, AMC)

Video Games

Dino D-Day: Imagine it’s World War II, and the Nazis have dinosaurs and you get to fight them. Do I even need to continue? Nazis dinosaurs = sale. (April 8, PC, Steam)

Shadow Harvest: Phantom Ops: I have no idea what this game is, but it seems to have been titled by some sort of random cool word generator. Other possibilities: Phoenix Operation: Dark Assassins, Legion Delta: Shadow Slayer, and Rising Phantom: Operation Shadow. See, it’s easy. (April 5, PC)

e-Books

Bossypants by Tina Fey: I’ll probably wait for the price to drop in the Kindle Store before picking this up, but her writing in The New Yorker has been great, so it’s definitely a sale.

Netflix Instant Pick of the Week

Cheers: I don’t know how long Cheers has been on Netflix Instant, but I swear I searched for it recently and it wasn’t there. It is now, though, all 270 episodes. I watched a few this weekend and it’s still as funny as I remember, though the pacing is glacially slow compared to current sitcoms.