Book Stuff

Not My Desk: The Book(s)!

Welcome to the new Not My Desk blog! It’s March, 2010, which means Not My Desk has been around for a full ten years, which is a pretty long time for something to be on the internet.

In related news, Not My Desk is no longer on the internet. Edit: it’s all back up now.  Click here for the old site.

There’s a reason for this, which clever readers may have gleaned from the title of this post. Finally, at long last, it’s time for what literally tens of people have been waiting for: a chance to pay me for essays that have been free to read for almost an entire decade.

I’m currently working on putting some of the essays from Not My Desk into book form. First, an e-book, which will be available on Amazon Kindle and the Kindle app for the iPod, hopefully by the end of April. Then, somewhere further down the line, possibly this summer, a real honest-to-goodness paper book, also available from Amazon. Note that I don’t have any kind of book deal; this is a self-publishing effort, so my dreams of owning a gold helicopter are still on hold.

What’s the difference between Not My Desk: The Website and Not My Desk: The Book? Excellent question. I’m glad I asked.

Frankly, uh, not much. I’m re-editing the essays, cleaning out the typos, dumping some of the junk, and adding a few all-new, never-before-seen essays to the book. I’ll have more details when I’m closer to having the e-book done next month.

As far as pricing, it’ll probably be between $3-$5 for the Kindle book, and maybe $13-$15 for the paper book, but I won’t know for sure until the books are ready.

But wait, you may be saying. I don’t have any money! Or, I have money, but I don’t want to give you any because I’m horribly selfish! Or, I never read the original essays, so how do I know if I want to buy a whole book of them?

Never fear. For those who can’t afford a book, or don’t want to pay, or have no idea what kind of writer I am, I’ll have some sample chapters up to read for free in the next couple weeks. And as for anything not going into the book, which is most of the archives, I’ll be re-posting all of that eventually as well for people to read for free. If you check the “Book” tab at the top of the page periodically, I’ll add more information as I get closer to publishing.

Also, in the meantime, I’m going to try to start blogging here again. This won’t be anything spectacular, but I’ll fill you in on what I’ve been doing in the past few years, and what I might be doing in the near future. And whatever else I can think of.

Welcome back! And, if you never left, thanks for sticking around.


  1. jzimbert says:

    Woo! Put me down for a paper copy. I ain’t got me one of them newfangled Kindle dealies.

  2. Thats funny as hell. Yesterday (or the day before?) I was on here re-reading some of your articles, and enjoying them, because I hadn’t read them in months. I came back today to read some more, and here I find them gone!

    Well in either case, I will probably buy the book all things said. Will you be adding more “Visions of the future” or whatever to it? That section was my favorite.

  3. mrmonkeybottoms says:

    I would be thrilled to buy your book because I LOVE YOU. In a non-stalkery kind of way. Yeah. That’s it.

  4. I am delighted that you are going to publish. I love your stuff and will happily pay to read it as my priorities are firmly ordered as they should be.

  5. Good to hear. Looking forward to buying the paper book.

  6. Nonomu198 says:

    Urgh, Chris! I was in the middle of reading your stuff. And now they are gone. I was just in the middle of one, too.

    Hope your book goes well, anyhow.

  7. Parental Units says:

    Congratulations and WooHoo! We’re so excited! We used to read your essays to our dinner party guests–now we’ll all have something to look forward to again!

  8. Just DO it!

  9. nancy (sister) says:

    I can’t wait!!! You can put me down for some paper copies! All my friends will get it for Christmas!

  10. Awesome idea! I will defenately buy a paper copy, I hope you add vision of the future and the temp chat, loved those:D

  11. I’m a cheap bastard, but I’ll buy your book. You’ve got a knack for comedy, and I feel like you could really do something with it. This book could be one of your first steps!

  12. Drusilla says:

    If you buy me a Kindle, I will totally buy the Kindle copy.

    By which I mean, put me down for the paper copy.

  13. piano guy says:

    Welcome back! I’ve checked back every once in a while and was stunned and thrilled to see that you’re back up again. Looking forward to getting your book. :)

  14. Holy. Crap. I am SO excited that you’re blogging again!

  15. Insanity is defined as repeating the same behavior (regularly visiting NMD as if it were a live website) and expecting a different result. Thanks for proving me sane after all.

  16. if for any reason the Who Moved My Cheese week essays are not in the book you will have failed. Awesome critique and funny. A must for a not my desk book in any format.

  17. Welcome back! I’ve missed Not My Desk a lot over the last few years. I don’t have a Kindle, but I will definitely buy a NMD book.

  18. This is amazing. I was just telling my friend about some of your essays and what a bummer it was that you weren’t writing them anymore. I came to the site to send him some links and here you are again. So exciting. You once made me laugh so hard I spit Snapple all over my computer monitor. People only do that in movies.
    Can’t wait to have your book on my shelf.

  19. Thank merciful christ! I check the site every so often just to see if you’re still alive. And now, low and behold, a brand new Not My Desk.

    As an aside, I first found this site many years ago while temping. Someone from the office I was working in was convinced that I was the author.

    Glad to see the old site as well… but here’s the burning question:

  20. Found your blog on dogpile search . Nice post and what a tip top site you have. Will check back here soon.

  21. Terry Thiel says:

    Chris!!! I’m with mrmonkeybottoms (!), Ernst (!!), piano guy (?) and all your other 10s of fans! I LOVE you, man, and I’ve been checking your blog every day for nine years like a pathetic loser d-bag without a life, even though I swear to you I am NOT a loser d-bag and I DO have a life (although, admittedly, I am pathetic.)

  22. word problem says:

    You’re back! I have missed you, my internet pseudo-buddy.

  23. Hey, you’re back! I’ve returned to re-read many times over the years, wondering whatever happened to that snarky temp guy. I still can’t read ‘The Hot Seat’ without laughing so hard that I need to take breaks in the middle for lack of being able to see through the tears and squinting. So yes, I’ll totally buy your book, Christopher.

    We started our blogs at the same time, roughly. Years before the word “blog.” I used to be ‘Jungle Sweet Jungle’ but became ‘Low Budget Superhero’ in 2005. Happy Ten Year Blogiversary!

  24. Hm. Wasn’t that something that I suggested about ten years ago?

    Cover of you standing by a canyon.

    “Not My Desk”.

    Anyway, good to see you’ve started writing again.

    (shit, been a long time since I used this name)

  25. I am thrilled that you are writing again, and very excited for your book. I spent my college years happily avoiding class and instead waiting for your new articles to get posted. They helped get through 4 very long years. And the exams were made all the more fun to go through………. LOOK BEHIND YOU! A BEAR!

    Welcome back!

  26. Yayyyyyyy!!!!!


    been checking back for years, and being sad that you weren’t writing here anymore. and I kind of enjoyed the game thingies, but I wanted the essays.

    so I’m procrastinating before sleep and a hugely busy morning with too much to do. and I move from a post about Rammellzee, to Wikipedia on Rakim of Eric B &, then on to Langston Hughes, then thinking about a picture of him at his desk, which made me think of desks, and I scooted over here already decided that you wouldn’t be here.
    and poof! here you are!

    will buy book: kindle for iphone it is!

  27. Yay! You are back :)
    NMD got me thru some awful temping days. I’d love to buy the book.

  28. Truly awesome. I’ve read all of your sites, and they never lose their charm. It’s good to see that you’re no longer temping (at least, from what I can tell).
    I would absolutely buy one of your books. Keep us posted.

  29. I keep hoping you’ll add more Colecovision game reviews. I don’t know which game to buy next.

  30. LCD monitors are the de factor standard these days because they do not consume too much electricity;’:

  31. msot computer monitors these days are already using LCD technology and some are LED-LCD ,`*

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