Featured | Local

Assassin Experiences Ancestor’s Memories, Connection Problems

animus

Animus 2.0 requires constant connection to server

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Work Stuff

The Unabridged Co-Worker Translation Guide

Co-workers: they’re always saying stuff, am I right? Ladies, you know what I’m talking about. Sometimes the things co-workers say are not the things they mean, and since I am the first person in history to ever notice this, here are some random entries from the Unabridged Co-Worker Translation Guide. Entry #249: “I can’t figure […]

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Not My Desk

Seriously, What Are You Doing Up There?

I ask the above question with no real sarcasm or snark, but out of simple curiosity. And perhaps a bit of impotent rage. Lately I’ve been lucky about waiting in lines: at the bank, at the store, at the bail bondsman, and all the usual places lines form. I keep arriving at places to get […]

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Featured | World

Millionaire Archaeologist Lara Croft Dead In Apparent Suicide

croft

Famed, frustrated archeologist tragically drowns self

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Local

Unlike Horses, New "Motorized Wagon" Essentially Theft-Proof

rdr car

As a newfangled mechanical contraption known as a “motorized wagon” arrived in Blackwater today, local officials heralded a new age wherein the wanton theft of personal conveyances would finally be at an end.

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