Movies, TV, Internet, Video Games, and E-Books
“Who designed this stupid spacesuit?” asked Isaac Clarke, a systems engineer, while whirling around and craning his neck in an effort to view his own back. “They built the health meter on the spine? Really? On the spine? Who is this supposed to be useful for, someone standing behind me?”
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“There are plenty of humans, dwarves, and elves to kill,” demonic Hurlock warrior says. “The job market for marauding demons is strong. I just worry about what comes next, after we’ve killed them all.”
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Roughly 30 years after the first shot was fired, it seems nothing — not the billions of lives lost, not the trillions of dollars spent, not even the repeated assassination of the dreaded Mecha-Hitler — will bring about the end of World War II.
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“Stop shooting!” a survivor known only as “Coach” yelled at his three baffled companions, who were trying to save his life from hordes of rampaging infected humans. “I need melee kills!”
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Sander Cohen, resident playwright, sculptor, poet, and theatre critic in the undersea city of Rapture, has definitively determined that minigames are not art, nor will they ever be.
Continue reading →The Office Mate is a play in two acts. It was written by Christopher Livingston. CURTAIN UP: INT – OFFICE WITH TWO DESKS AND TWO WORKERS. ONE WORKER IS NAMED CHRISTOPHER LIVINGSTON. THE OTHER WORKER IS NAMED PETER PETER IS WORKING ON HIS COMPUTER LOOKING ON THE GROUP DRIVE (CALLED THE X-DRIVE) FOR SOME CONSTRUCTION […]
Continue reading →An artist named Marina Abramovic is performing in the Museum of Modern Art, in an installation called The Artist is Present, where she sits in a chair all day, from the museum’s opening to closing. Apparently, that’s all she does, sit in a chair, staring straight ahead, which is apparently art. Well, shit. I’ve been […]
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“There were no warnings from the ump, and no bench clearing brawls, even after drilling eight straight batters in the head with fastballs. That’s really disappointing. I was really hoping there would be fights this year.” says Josh Beckett.
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The sole suspect in over a thousand violent cop killings was reluctantly released today with no formal charges being filed, police say. Despite overwhelming evidence, the lack of a legal system in Liberty City prevented police detaining and trying the suspect for his alleged crimes.
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“I was expecting The Beatles, but this sounded more like a disorganized, possibly drunk bunch of amateurs, trying to play the same one song over and over, stopping in the middle, and then starting over again,” said Cavern Club patron.
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